祂看顧麻雀 His Eyes is On The Sparrow

人原來是很容易就打退堂鼓的，因為化療的過敏，我對昨天的驗血有時就希望不過關，以這樣來表示神攔阻化療﹗(很天真﹗)另一方面，又覺得怎麼這樣沒有勇氣。

其實，昨天讀希伯來書3:1，神已叫我思想主耶穌，他在神所任命的事上盡忠，我不是說我轉了新工嗎，就得好好地做，這樣就能把可誇的盼望和膽量堅持到底。

(希伯來書3:1-6) 同蒙天召的聖潔弟兄啊，你們應當思想我們所認為使者、為大祭司的耶穌。 2 他為那設立他的盡忠，如同摩西在上帝的全家盡忠一樣。 3 他比摩西算是更配多得榮耀，好像建造房屋的比房屋更尊榮； 4 因為房屋都必有人建造，但建造萬物的就是上帝。 5 摩西為僕人，在上帝的全家誠然盡忠，為要證明將來必傳說的事。 6 但基督為兒子，治理上帝的家；我們若將可誇的盼望和膽量堅持到底，便是他的家了。

睡前和范牧師再讀詩篇50篇，神再次說，空中的飛鳥，我都知道(認識) 50:11。想起了小時候，教會的師母(袁戒玉琴師母)給我起了個外號「小麻雀」，她說我面孔細小，但愛唱歌，叫我做小雀鳥，我知道這是神再次的保證。

年輕時，在香港替環球廣播電台錄詩歌給大陸，主持人把其中一次所錄的幾首聖詩，做成盒帶給我(只這次，其他都沒有，因歌是錄大盤帶)。伴奏是張有光牧師的女公子之一，她的伴奏極棒，我快她快，我慢她支持，一次過就錄完。可惜過後就再沒有機會再見，趁這機會謝謝她。我相信四十年前，神已有預備，今天可以和大家分享

為何灰心常怨嘆 為何黑影濔漫 為何心靈覺孤單 甚至欲脫塵寰 耶穌是我的良友 萬福賜我享受 祂既看顧小麻雀 深知我必蒙眷佑 祂既看顧小麻雀 深知我必蒙眷佑

我聽救主溫柔聲 除去你心憂情 安息主懷多恬靜 毫無疑懼戰驚  有主引領在前頭 步步跟隨祂走 祂既看顧小麻雀 深知我必蒙眷佑  祂既看顧小麻雀 深知我必蒙眷佑

我唱因我得自由 我唱因我無憂 我救主既看顧麻雀 深知我必蒙眷佑

感謝神，驗血報告過關。

神許可，明天4/22， 3:00pm第二週化療。這次只用一種藥求神透過明天的療程知道我的心臟在上次化療後跳得快,是否因這藥受影響.

心中感激著范牧師，我人生的伴侶；家人。還有你們，親愛的代禱者。

Turned out I found myself  to be very easy to back down, because allergies to chemotherapy, there were some moments yesterday that I wish the blood tests would not pass,  naively to think that God's hand not let me to do chemotherapy! (Very naive!) On the other hand, and wondered why I was so scary.

 In fact, yesterday Hebrew reading, God already told me to think about Jesus, He was faithful on what God has appointed, Have not saying that now I have  a new part time job?, Then I  have to do it well, so I can rejoicing of the hope and courage to persist in the end.

Bedtime Simon and I read Psalm 50 again, God says again, the birds of the air, I know them. 50:11 It reminds me whenI was a child, my church pastor's wife Mrs. Esther Yung gave me the nickname "Little Sparrow," she said that I had a tiny facel, but love to sing, should call me little bird , I know that this is God's guarantee again .

When I was young, I volunteer HKTWR to sing hymns for China ministry,  the hosts made me a cassett of one recording (only that time, the others were in large wheel tape). One of Pastor Cheung Yau Kwong's daughter was the pianist, her accompaniment fantastic and so supportive, we did it just one tick.  Unfortunately, there was no chance for us to do it again after a bye, would like to take this opportunity to thank her. I believe that God has prepared this 40 years ago for me to share with you all today.

Thank God, the blood test report is OK,God permits, tomorrow 4/22, 3:00 pm the second chemotherapy. Only one chemo medication will be used, pray that the doctor and I will know whether my racing heart (after last infusion) was being affected by that particular one or not.

Deep deep thanks to Simon, my life partner;  and family. And you all, my dear intercessors.